Your desire to change must be greater than your desire to stay the same. That’s why pain so often precedes the most wonderful journeys. And if the desire to change is just a background murmur that crops up every now and then, but comfort outweighs the murmur….then in one place you’ll stay a while longer.
Seeing as how life is a journey, it’s important to address that we all go through stages. Periods of momentum, periods where we feel stagnant, periods where we coast. And all are huely important because without one we wouldn’t have the others…we all need time to rest, to reflect, to take action, and of course to learn. The learning can often feel in the moment like wasted time, or that we are doing something “wrong” because things aren’t aligning and happening easily. Respect that phase. Because before you know it you’ll be catapulted into the next chapter, and if you didn’t do the learning, chances are chapter 8 will read a lot like chapter 7. And that doesn’t make for a best seller.
OK but let’s consider the multitudes of us who feel like we are spending a lot of time in a grey area. Where life is OK, work is OK, relationships are OK…you have fun with life and it can all be rather jolly at the weekends, but still there’s that feeling of grey or fog.
What change are you craving? What is the murmur? And how do you turn the murmur into a blood-shaking-scream?
Well first you have to be clear with yourself about what it is you want. It’s like craving chips and settling for boiled potatoes. The craving will still be there. So ask yourself what do I want? Write down the answer, somewhere you can see it. Turn it into a mantra because you need to align your conscious and subconscious mind to wanting it. If your subconscious mind is saying yes, but your conscious mind knows it’ll take work and it’s easier to stay put, conscious will dominate every day of the week. But by understanding what the whisper of desire is saying and the WHY, the two will begin to work together and the pain to remain the same will be much greater than the pain it takes to change. Sometimes life creates circumstances that do that for us….but a lot of the time we have to decisively WORK so that the scales tip and you are rolling down the hill of change with such momentum Usain Bolt couldn’t keep up with you to get to the Holy Land.
Meditation helps. It strengthens your mind, helps pull out the weeds of doubt – separating the girls from the Goddesses, if you will.
Exercise helps. Yoga, running, lifting, you prove to yourself that you CAN endure discomfort to get to a more positive end.
Self-care helps. Eating right is a demonstration to yourself that you care about yourself. So is having a long bath, or reading a book, going for a walk or anything that counts as you time. You are saying YES to yourself everytime you take care of you. And that will reinforce to yourself that you are WORTH the goal and more.
So whether you are in a period of momentum, coasting or stagnating…it’s all good so long as you are being honest with yourself about where you are and where you want to be and what you could be doing about it.
I encourage us all to build the life of our dreams. We are so lucky for countless reasons…it’d be rude not to.